As I laid in bed waiting for my son to fall asleep this evening, I noticed the brilliance of color the low light from the setting sun strewn across my bedroom. I began to see words dancing all around the room. Faith, Believe, Joy, Family, my childrens names. I think now I will be shopping for wall tattoos. What an astonishing year this 2012 has been thus far for me and my babies.
I crept down the long stair case, with the original banister from 100 years ago, and each step has its own unique groan. Made me smile as I remembered the house I grew up in, there was never any way to sneak then either! ~smiles~ As I round the corner at the bottom of the stairs and head out into my favorite room, my kitchen, I am caught again with awe at the colors the light threw my new curtains lays out across the walls. Do you know that feeling, the one deep inside your tummy.....warm and inviting that lets you know you are safe and happy? I dont believe in all of my life, that I can remember anyway, that I have ever felt so connected to a house as I am to this one.
I look at the days laid out behind me in 2011.....and am so filled with awareness for all that has happened to/for us in the last few months. I didnt even realize I was so worried about things until I was no longer in that space we just left. The last walk through it was short and sweet, and as much as I loved the calm there, I was light on my feet as I said goodbye and walked away from it for good.
Words like gratitude and respect in the written form seem so small in comparison to how I feel right now. My energy just knew I had to put it down. I felt a need to put to "paper" my thoughts and feelings. I have known gratitude and respect for a great many things in my life, from the smallest of things to the biggest. In these moments this evening as I walked through my new home, I was floating on a cloud of acknowledgment larger than I have ever felt before. (Well, except for the birth of my babies, but on such a different level)
I can feel the energy stir as I listen to the sounds of my children playing up and down and all around this large space and I find myself smiling more and more each day. That is the way it is I have found, when I am open to all things, without thought to control any situation. I have opened up to the Universe and in its infinite wisdom, I am shown yet again, that the plan for me is ever so much more than what I can imagine. There is much to be said about sitting down in life and letting go of the wheel, as opposed to white knuckling the direction WE WANT to go in. The irony is so simple I almost missed it.
This exercise in acceptance for me has been so enlightening. I know I must sound all gushy and stuff.....but I wanted to sit down and pen it out so to speak before the thought was lost among all the others.
We are all able to have this magic in our lives. Worry Doubt and Fear play WAY to big a part in most of our lives. 2011 was proof positive to me that the worry is not the winning side of life. I have stepped over that line and am now standing firmly in FAITH with Gratitude in my heart and pouring out of every pore!
Love and blessings to you all!!!!
The Photo is a of Lake Pepin at Sunset! This is where we now live. Isnt it beautiful!
MsPeg is very direct and honest. Her moto is say what you mean and mean what you say.